My Thoughts on MLK, Jr. Day
(I originally wrote this column 12 years ago. I felt a need to reprint it following a discussion over whiskey and cigars with a friend. Thanks for indulging me.)
Recently I had a conversation with a black friend of mine and she told me something I found was a bit disturbing. We were arguing over crime and how to deal with it when she told me, “Abdul, your attitude is typical of middle-class back folk.” I asked her to tell me what that meant. She then went on to say as middle-class blacks tend to move up the socio-economic ladder, they forget their origins, and treat poor blacks the same way whites do.
I have to say I was a bit taken back by all this, because I was being attacked for my status in life which I had no control over. So I told her that she really needed to get grip and maybe the weave in her head was too tight and slowing the flow of oxygen to her brain.
I for one find it rather annoying that I’m accused of being insensitive just because I have a low tolerance level for crime, welfare, and people reproducing who shouldn’t. And I’m not saying these problems are exclusive to poor black neighborhoods so get that attitude out of your head right now.
What I am saying is that attitudes of individual responsibility, self-reliance, and hard work are not the exclusive property of white folks. Why should I send my children to horrible schools and stay in crime-ridden neighborhoods? What possible point could there be to prove? That I’m a well-to-do idiot? I don’t think so. I’m sure there would be some thrill in moving my furniture in my house in the middle of the night so no one will see and steal it later that day while I’m out working.
Many middle-class blacks feel a sense of guilt at having made a measure of success for themselves while seeing the fellow “brothers and sisters” left behind. The logic being older, middle-class blacks can remember when they were shut out of the “mainstream” by whites and don’t want to return the favor. I for one have no such guilt because there’s a big difference between closing the door on people because of race, which has nothing to do with behavior, and having serious concerns about people who haven’t learned how to honor the social contract, which does have a lot to do with behavior.
This is not to say that poverty and bad behavior are soulmates; both my parents grew up poor in the rural south, however they didn’t hop in the horse and buggy and do drive-by shootings either. What I am saying is blacks who are doing well should not make excuses or feel responsible for those who don’t. I personally am shocked at stories I hear of people voting against their own interests (particularly economic) for the benefit of someone else, especially when the end result is counter-productive. But I know what you’re saying, “Abdul, other ethnic groups work together why shouldn’t we?” I am not saying blacks shouldn’t work together. What I am saying is that if you’re in a balloon that’s going down, the first thing you do is get rid of the dead weight.
I am all for helping people who want to better their situations, but the only way people will ever make any real achievement in this world is when individuals decide they want to take personal responsibility for their actions and take charge of their destiny. And accommodating bad behavior is not the way to make that come about.
(Thanks for indulging me. Next time I’ll talk about apologizing for slavery. Bye! Bye!)
As you can see, very little has changed since my early 20s.
