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Father Hood

Yesterday, I posted a really bad joke on my Twitter account. I asked “what’s the definition of mass confusion?” The answer, “a Father’s Day picnic at 42nd and Post Road”.  It’s actually a very old joke and easily adaptable to any social setting, take the former Governor of California, for example. And while a lot of the punditocracy spent Sunday pontificating on the importance of fathers, I honestly think we would have fewer societal issues if fewer people became fathers in the first place.

Allow me to elaborate. This past week a 16-year old was arrested for shooting and robbing a man on the Monon Trail. In less than four weeks a lot of good-hearted people are going to team up with law enforcement and patrol downtown Indianapolis during the second Saturday of Indiana Black Expo because some people are going to let their children run loose. For the past several weeks we’ve had hearings on the possible state takeover of failing schools because, in part, some people have decided not to be good parents and let their children’s’ education go straight to hell.

When I look at those few examples, it makes me wonder why instead of defunding Planned Parenthood, Indiana lawmakers didn’t increase funding and hand out gift cards. Let’s face it, some people are not just ready to be parents. And instead of chastising them, we really should turn our efforts into convincing them not to procreate. It’s not fair to the children and certainly not fair to us who will have to bear the costs, financial and otherwise, of their bad choices.

I know some of you are saying “Abdul, who the blank are you to say who can and can’t have kids?”   The flippant answer would be “I’m Abdul”.  The more thoughtful answer is I’m not saying people should not be allowed to procreate,  what I’m saying is that it would be nice if people made more informed decisions and were better equipped before bringing children into this world. Let’s be honest, if Mom and Dad are hooking up at $2 Tequila shot night, there’s a pretty big chance the rest of us will be picking up the tab for that love connection for quite a few years to come.

So instead of wringing our hands about how fathers are abdicating their responsibilities and women are making poor choices for getting together with these men whose sole purpose in this world is to not violate probation, how about we spend a bucks and make contraception a lot more available. It would save the rest of us a lot of headache and taxes.

Hope you had a great Father’s or Baby Daddy’s Day., whichever the case might have been, unless of course you’re waiting for the paternity test to come back from the Maury Povich Show.

  • Think Again

    A solid argument.  Except;

    The PP de-funding, had nothing to do with contraception.  I think most of the legislators who voted for the de-funding, would likely support expanded contraception.

    It was still dumb.  

  • Jack

    As is often the case, you have commented on a subject that needs both more commentary and action to address the issue well. When (and if) males would accept personal responsibility for their procreations rather than bragging about the “notches on their gun” a lot of social problems would be better handled.  While the simple statement of “don’t do it” makes sense it simply is not consistent with reality.  The issue has many parts and while there might be general agreement on “don’t do it” to begin with the multiple issues of “what now” don’t seem to get much agreement as to “what”.  Sadly, procreation can mean very bad things for the female involved (and her family) and most certainly for the child while much too often daddy takes a walk. Those who “walk the high road” of morality and stand against everything about the issue may feel justified but does not answer the concerns of the damaged lives. This is coming from a grandparent who has grandchildren they are raising without support (financial or otherwise) from any of the parents involved.

  • pascal

    As is the idea that contraception lowers abortion rates when,in fact, it increases them.  Dumb is spreading.

  • pascal

    The idea that the government should become “daddy” is also a foolish policy.  Been tried.  Expensive.  Doesn’t work.

  • Jack

    Uh, if government involvement was suggested in my response, I missed it.   Government involvement such as availability of contraceptives IS part of the answer and have never seen any evidence to the contrary.  As TA pointed out the defunding of PP will likely have unwanted consequences.

  • Pingback: A Tale of Two Conservatives

  • Think Again

    You’ll have to let me ponder that one.  Surely, you meant to type more “facts”…as presented, you’re patently wrong.  But maybe there’s “more to the story.”

  • melyssa

    Ok, this may seem extreme to some of you.  

    I think we should offer people a moderate cash incentive to get “fixed” so they don’t have feral babies. Two hundred dollars would be a good amount. There would be people waiting in line for the cash and the procedure. 

    Anyone who would sell their reproductive rights should not be a parent. 

    I also think we should drug test (like Florida) to get welfare benefits and require community service from people who collect public funded benefits.  Community service could be something as simple as pulling the weeds from the public curb in front of your street or picking up the trash on your block.

  • pascal

    Read more about it.  Even Alan G concedes.  And, I am never patently wrong and only have to contribute to Haiti via the church’s collection basket.

  • pascal

    AFDC began replacing natural fathers as breadwinners and this trend continued until Losing Ground destroyed the compassion argument (and the political purchase of a sizable minority population).  After the Black family was destroyed, as pointed out at the time by Senator Pat M, benign neglect became the government policy and Black males became useless, supplanted by Uncle Stupid. 
        It is true that your post did not mention government involvement but most folks realize that the destruction of the family has been one of the driving forces of the government whether realized by most or not. 
         As to the evidence you have never seen, well, you have to be looking for it. 

  • Pogden297

    TA, correct.  Thanks for being honest about that.  It was about the fungability of money.  You make PP more profitable in women’s health services area, it gives them more money to do abortion.  There are a few, but most are not against the other services PP offers. 

    I don’t know why you think it was dumb.  It was dumb of the state to contract with PP in the first place.  I haven’t read the legal arguments.  I don’t know why the State should be obligated to contract with PP. 

    The sad thing is PP has all these people conned into advocating for PP under the guise that women’s health care is being attacked.  In fact, it’s all about PP keeping lucrative government contracts, keeing its mononpoly on these types of services.

  • Pogden297

    Yeah, Melyssa, I think that is extreme.  That’s only a step above forced sterilization and Indiana infamously has been down that road.

    As far as testing people who get government benefits, where is that going to end?  If we get a tax refund, should we be drug tested?  If we get social security should we be drug tested?  Your suggestion opens the door to enormous government intrusion into people’s personal lives.

    As far as workfare, a lot of states have that.  The trouble you always have is that the waivers (such as those for people with health problems) always constitute the majority of recepients.  It also makes the program much more expensive to adminster.

  • Jack

    I suspect your view on about anything (scientific study or social issue or whatever) and my conclusion on the same information is very likely to be very different.  I accept that as a fact everytime I read one of your posts.

  • cynical sam

    Good try at extreme.  How about this:

    Mom can have the baby but either she discloses useless dad and he gets snipped or she can get tied.  Womans choice. Pro-choice. Somebody is going to be held responsible for a change.  It may put a pause in the intensity of the hunt for the male animal.

  • Think Again

    Yeah, you are.  Often.  Predictably.  But that’s ok. 

    Rubbers stop pregnancies.  And a lot of disease.  Pretty simple facts.

    In Haiti and Indy.  Same everywhere.

  • Anonymous

    In the spirit of taking care of children-in-need in the short run, we’ve let fear of accusations of intruding upon “rights”, or prejudice, or racism prevent us from taking care of the child, and society, in the long run. 

    Children aren’t cars you patch up after accidents and expect them to be what they were.  The abuse/neglect that’s done by age two or three very often affects the child the rest of their life.   When the state’s well meaning welfare to take care of the needy child doesn’t include sufficient follow-up visits to the home, inspections, “quality control”- then the results are arguably worse than a non-inspected off-shore drilling platform spewing everywhere, or government agencies and financial firms that nearly crash our economy as Congress and the SEC look the other way.

    With dysfunctional state-subsidized parenting, we get statistical increases in abuse/neglect in the home, obeisity, poor graduation rates, drug abuse, incarceration, and most of all:  a repeat of the whole cycle and another generation of dependency on a dwindling pool of taxpayers.   

    If we want to really get ”recivilized”, I would argue for a return to former parenting standards, especially having two adults in the home to parent.  If we’re not going to put the genie back in the bottle on societal norms, we have to at least make the long-term investment to deincentize abysmal parenting by shoring-up foster care or bulk housing alternatives that at least avoid abuse and neglect to the young child (I know, I know- we have to do better than orphanages of old.  However, the bar for “real” parenting has been lowered).  

    I would imagine a long-term business case could be made, given the fiscal and moral costs of all the social ills from bad parenting.  Particularly, when you contrast the declining productivity we’re collectively creating by looking the other way (as our global competitors are raising their game). 

    By no means does abusive and neglectful parenting have to come from a single-parent household, a poor one, a certain race or ethnicity, etc.  There are successes and failures of every variation all around us.  However, in our morally and fiscally deficit nation, with a goal of societal protection and the launching of the next generation of productive citizens, we neglect the child and our country without demanding long-term accountability and  solutions.   

  • Think Again

    In some cases, dad may not be, uh, readily known.  

    So why would we penalize the defenseless babies in that situation?

    No-win.

  • Rico

    How in the hell can you equate a tax refund with welfare???  Melyssa is right on!

  • Rico

    Since when are you concerned with penalizing defenseless babies?  Are they not defenseless when still in the womb?

  • melyssa

    There is nothing at all forced about it, Paul.  It’s completely voluntary and consensual.  

    Employers drug test.  When you pull a work-free paycheck from the taxpayers’ purse, then the taxpayer should be able to demand a drug test for our payment.  No one is forcing anyone to apply for welfare, just as I am not forced to apply for a job that requires a drug test.   There’s a better chance of a person transitioning into working society if they are clean and sober, anyway.  Employers want sober, they don’t want druggies. 

    I do, however, see your point about the administration of expecting work for the handouts we give. 

  • melyssa

    I saw a Maury Povich show once where the chick had been through more than 10 DNA tests and still didn’t know the dad. 

    During the show I watched, the guy she said was the dad was not a DNA match.  The hysterical woman threw herself on the floor at Maury’s feet and started screaming and wailing like a child.  

    If she acted like that on TV, can you imagine what she will do in real life?  Should she be a parent?  What will her son become with a mother like her. 

    At some point, we have to think about what these people are breeding.   Their kids grow up worse than the parents and will plague future generations with more of the same.  

  • melyssa

    And Paul?  I’d even be cool with the state offering free voluntary sterilization procedures.  I’m sure many people would take them up on it.   

    Sterilization is something you can pay for now. How great for poor people if the taxpayers just gave it away? 

  • melyssa

    And Paul?  I’d even be cool with the state offering free voluntary sterilization procedures.  I’m sure many people would take them up on it.   

    Sterilization is something you can pay for now. How great for poor people if the taxpayers just gave it away? 

  • melyssa

    Unfortunately “the hunt” for the father would often end up found in the prison system. 

  • melyssa

    Unfortunately “the hunt” for the father would often end up found in the prison system. 

  • melyssa

    After thinking about it, I am sure something could be designed to force community service work for the welfare payment. 

    It could be as simple as requiring the recipient to file a detailed report of the work they’ve done each month with the caveat that a surprise inspection or audit of that work could be done at any time by the state and “x” number of welfare recipients will be randomly checked just as they do the probation alcohol and drug screening now. 
    As far as the disabled ones? I’m sure we could find something for them to do to earn their keep.  If they don’t have a GED, they should be made to study.  

    It should be a  hassle to get and stay on welfare.  It should not be easy. 

  • pascal

    And, Paul, let’s not forget genocide practiced against Blacks.

  • pascal

    You will not likely ever have the same information.  At times I will source things in short hand, such as Losing Ground, a book by Charles Murray, libertarian scholar, writer of very influencial books.  The instant book was the key informer to lawmakers who very much altered the American Welfare state back in Clinton’s day.  Short book.  Classic scholarship.  Read it and then get back to us.  If you read the footnotes you will be able to competently comment on IPS and their serial lies re graduation rates and the declining value of their diploma.
          His Real Education book was assigned by Mitch to the Indiana Roundtable.  So, Mr. Murray has a lot to offer Indiana and those residents of it that may wish to know/learn which end is up.

  • pascal

    You want to end all this foolishness?  Award custody of the children in divorce proceedings to the Male.  Period.  End No Fault Divorce as well and you lower the cost of the judicial system another 30% and put a bunch of parasites to a lower standard of living while increasing their productive use.
         The awarding of children strictly to the Male was the old practice.  A moment’s thought and it will be clear as to why intact families were thus encouraged. 

  • pascal

    http://www.lifenews.com/2011/06/20/planned-parenthood-indiana-may-cut-staff-after-de-funding/  Your tears for abortionists are misplaced.  Ever look into AIDS in Africa?  Africans who loaded up on the “rubbers” are now mostly dead.  Use of rubbers stop some pregnancies but do increase abortion rates especially if the fools using them use the Planned Parenthood brand (see Consumer Reports).  Not same everywhere.  It is either Uganda or Nigeria where AIDS rates are in decline.  Get back to us when you know why.

  • pascal

    What is an unalienable right?  Americans are peculiar in history for having a belief in them.  We are familiar with some that were enumerated in our Founding Document but there are others implied by the language….”among these are…..”.

  • cynical sam

    No baby penalized. Mom has baby, mom gets fixed so she can’t be stupid again. 

    BTW, Poor writing on my part. I was referring to the incessant hunting of “game” by the males.

  • Arc7

    Pretty good idea for stabilization of courtship, marriage, procreation, and divorce.  Will require nomination of Conan the Barbarian or Sgt. Fury for the Republicans and all the women voters to not be able to find the polls.  But, hey, it was getting a little too mellow debating abortion……

  • pascal

    This actually was the universal practice in the US prior to women getting the vote-a huge mistake, that.

  • Pogden297

    Melyssa, you’re quickly losing your libertarian cred with all this advocating of government involvement in people’s personal lives.

  • Pogden297

    I’m sorry, I can’t get over the fact you watched a Maury Povich show.  Every show is the same…about baby daddies and DNA tests.  My brain starts deteriorating about 5 minutes into the program.

  • Pogden297

    “End No Fault Divorce as well and you lower the cost of the judicial system another 30% and put a bunch of parasites to a lower standard of living while increasing their productive use.”

    Actually ending no fault divorce would increase the cost and increase the legal work in a divorce. It’s not going to put lawyers out of work.  Once you have to prove “fault” in a marriage you greatly expand the complexity of a divorce.  Attorneys love that.

  • melyssa

    Don’t be sorry Paul.  Sounds like you watched one too.  It is human nature, I think, to not be able to turn away from watching a train wreck. 

  • MH

    NCPanther Dad  is known!   ;)

  • Pascal

    http://www.profam.org/pub/fia/fia.2005.6.htm#Redefining_Marriage What you say may be correct for the one divorce case but the idea is to greatly reduce the number of divorces and end the social costs they dump on society.  Trimming the judicial system down by 30% is, as they say, only a good beginning.  Ending the dumping of functional bastards on to the schools is another cost reduction. The social costs of allowing lawyers to profit by aiding the government in the destruction of intact families are getting to be too great to be ignored. 
        It used to be that attorneys really didn’t like divorce cases at all and were under obligation in their formerly grounded ethics, to preserve marriages to the extent they were able.  Now that legal ethics have become somewhat a bad joke, not to mention, as ungrounded as pre WWII German jurists, busting up most anything for profit is fair game.
         And, yes, fixing the mess will put lawyers out of work and it is a good thing to do so in this case-and let the judges and judicial system put in 40 hour weeks on more important things like white collar crime in Indianapolis.